Landed

8.10.10

We have landed in Beijing China.

I don’t know what to say, that was a big step for me. As we descended into the city from the air I saw what looked like a giant raincloud situated over the city. I have since come to understand that it is just the massive amount of smog and pollution that blankets the city. We are told that running outside for 30 minutes is the equivalent of smoking an entire pack of cigarettes in America. With that said, I haven’t figured out how I will work out yet. If there is anything that I do not care for about China so far, it is this. The sun cannot even penetrate the thick cover that is the fog.

My first transaction in China was the purchase of a grande Iced Coffee from Starbucks and I think that it went very well. The language is not too difficult if one just sits down and takes the opportunity to learn it. People stare at and are intrigued by me (because I’m black). It doesn’t bother me that much, though. I feel like that’s just one of those things that happens and you just deal.

Surprisingly, their cars are a lot like the ones in America. They are not like the super compact ones that travelers find in Europe and places like that. BMW, Audi, Porsche, and other “high end” cars inhabit the streets in surprising frequency. Although, Chinese greed is about the same as ours and I am told that status is everything.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life

Here I am on one of the most intensely frightening things that I have ever done. I am trying to wrap my head around just what it is that has got me worked up like this. I think that it has something to do with the immensity of this project on which I am embarking.
In case you are wondering, or have not heard the news, I have accepted a position teaching English in Beijing, China. As you may know, I love to travel the world and yes, China is on my list of places to visit.Even with all of those things considered, one can not be prepared for the path that your mind takes when you realize that you will be away from home for an entire year. Not only will your home environment have changed, but you, as a person will have become completely self sufficient whether you want to or not. It is possible that the relationships that you started and nurtured will disappear or fade into nothingness. It is possible that the girl that you like will have grown in an entirely different direction. Friends may have become enemies and enemies may have become your greatest allies. This is what I think about. This is what scares me.
Here I sit, in seat 24A, a small shoulder length space next to a window that dare not be opened for fear of flooding the entire cabin with light. I eat my beef stir fry with chop sticks to try to grasp, evermore, at the culture that has, henceforth, been a mystery. Just over half of the plane ride is gone and I still see no end in sight.
The language, for me, is a cumbersome one that I am not very familiar with. The only comfort, I think to myself, is that Spanish was once the same way and I conquered it. My challenge, however, is to do what took me 6 years, in 1. Needless to say this will prove a daunting task.

How do you tell someone how much they mean to you without ruining everything? Decisions must be made at every stage of and those decisions can change your whole life.

Well, here I sit. Another day of packing has been completed and it's sad. I just feel like I'm shuffling through my entire life and it's kind of heartbreaking. I should be used to this, this is my 4th move in 4 years not counting . I should have it down to a science, right? It's almost as if my things should already be pre-packed.

I'm not sure why I'm still up and I've lost my original train of thought. But I'm sitting in my bed on my computer watching the commercial for P90X. I know that I really should just be doing it and not only watching the commercial. I know that I could look like these guys and be more flexible if I only tried. I think that I might try Tai Chi while im in Beijing. I hope that it will increase my flexibility and my calm. Of course I hope to still be working out during this year. I will have the digital version of P90X on my computer that I will be able to do. So, really, I could still do it.

I am at a loss. Should I stay, should I go? I do not belong here, in this house, with these people. How can I walk out there and smile at them knowing what I know and having done what I've done? It's very nearly impossible.

Concerns.

It's the last day of the world cup and I'm finding that I'm kind of sad. I'm finding out now that the end of the world cup means the beginning of my time in China. I am dreadfully afraid of leaving now. I wasn't before but now, things are changing and the looming results of my decision are showing up. I have NO understanding of the culture or the language. I have no money, or place to stay. I also have no friends there. I know that God will provide for me. But putting my trust in Him halfway around the world is proving to be a larger task than I had originally thought. Plus, I've just reconnected with an old friend which has proved to be a fantastic thing for me and my life. My family is moving back to the area where I grew up, the place I love and I've got a couple leads on some good jobs that I think I would be very good at.

17 Quotes

Here are 17 of my favourite quotes on Being, Living, and Doing.

Enjoy.

“Fall seven times; stand up eight.” – Japanese proverb

“You must give up the life you planned in order to have the life that is waiting for you.” – Joseph Campbell

“The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” – Chinese Proverb

“You must be the change you want to see in the world.” – Gandhi

“Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” – Theodore Roosevelt

“I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.” – Jimmy Dean

“All is flux, nothing stays still.” – Heraclitus

“For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for everything you gain, you lose something else.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Every man must decide whether he will walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive selfishness.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

“I am tomorrow, or some future day, what I establish today. I am today what I established yesterday or some previous day.” – James Joyce

“I don’t need a friend who changes when I change and who nods when I nod; my shadow does that much better.” – Plutarch

“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” – Epicurus

“Be a first rate version of yourself, not a second rate version of someone else” – Judy Garland

“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” – Anne Frank

“The mind can make a heaven out of hell or a hell out of heaven” – John Milton

“Try not to become a man of success but a man of value.” – Albert Einstein

“The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance; the wise grows it under his feet.” – James Oppenheim